Issue Date: June 27, 2004

In this article: Tales from the "Age of Warped Woof"

Is your pet family?

As many of you say yes as say no. Our expert panel, led by Contributing Editor Steve Dale, chews on the subject.

Are we going overboard with pet love? A generation ago, pets were, well, just pets. But for many people today, they're full-fledged members of the family. According to an American Animal Hospital Association survey, more than half of all pet owners celebrate their pets' birthdays. Another AAHA survey revealed that most owners would rather be stranded on a desert island with their pet than with another human. Hotels increasingly have special programs for their four-legged guests, and you can find restaurants that not only allow dogs on patios, but offer a special menu for canine clientele. We're sharing our lives, even our beds, with our animals; they've moved from the doghouse into our house.

Are pet owners bonkers? USA WEEKEND's Steve Dale put together a freewheeling discussion with three experts on where pets fit into our lives today:

"Captain" Arthur Haggerty has been training dogs for 45 years, including some for appearances on "Stupid Pet Tricks" with David Letterman; his most recent book is "How to Teach Your Dog to Talk."

Annemarie Lucas appears on "Animal Precinct" on the Animal Planet cable channel and is a supervisory special investigator for the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.

Veterinary behaviorist Karen Overall is a researcher in the psychiatry department at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine. Her book, "Clinical Behavioral Medicine for Small Animals," is considered a bible in the field. Her research includes studying animals to learn more about human psychiatric illness, and she lectures worldwide about animal behavior.

Dale: Do we treat our pets too well? Loving our animals is one thing, but at some level, are we forgetting they are cats and dogs, not little people?

Lucas: I don't believe we can treat them too well. I see abused animals every day. I go to the pet store once a week, and Phoebe [her Yorkshire terrier-Shih Tzu mix] picks out her own dog toy each time. A little indulgent, maybe. But where's the harm?

Haggerty: There's nothing wrong with loving our dogs. But people have gone nutty. Dogs are workaholics, and we have a nation filled with unemployed dogs. Instead of turning to alcohol, they turn to the drapes and rip them to shreds, or they turn on their families, because they've literally taken over the household.

Overall: It's not true that all dogs are workaholics. Some flunk out of guide-dog school, and others were bred to sit in our laps.

Dale: But for the most part, rules and structure are a good thing. I'm often asked questions about serious problem dogs who make too many of their own decisions, rather than following the lead of people. On the other paw, I'm seeing more well-socialized dogs than ever -- dogs who dine out with their people, who go to the dry cleaner or video store. These are well-trained, happy dogs. It's terrific that we're becoming a more dog-friendly society.

Overall: I agree that these [socialized] dogs benefit, and so does society. There is nothing wrong with a little pampering. The problems occur when we don't meet our pets' needs. But dogs need to be dogs, rolling in the mud and sniffing at the most disgusting things on the street.

Lucas: Clearly, if overindulgence affects health, it's not good. But I see emaciated pets every day. It's interesting; people do raise their pets like children. It's now proven that where animal abuse exists, there's likely to be child abuse.

Haggerty: Well, we're not doing any better at raising our dogs than we are our children. We hear a diagnosis like separation anxiety. And the vet gets to dispense drugs like Prozac and Xanax for dogs -- c'mon, give me a break! It's all psychobabble.

Overall: We used to just abandon problem dogs; now we can help them. While the drugs don't solve the problem, they do influence brain chemistry. Drugs make it possible for a trainer to modify behavior. Besides, if the dog or cat is less anxious and not suffering, isn't that a good thing?

Dale: It's also a matter of culture. A few generations back, Mom was home with the dog, and the kids came home early from school. Today, we have latchkey dogs. Some dogs handle it better than others. There are even cats who have separation anxiety because their people are never there. Cats are far more social than previously thought. Haggerty, stop rolling your eyes! I give you a lot of credit, because the truth is that more pets are put down for "bad behavior" than die from all kinds of cancers combined. So dog trainers who can make a difference save lives.

Lucas: I see the other side -- people whose idea of training a dog is to beat it senseless. The goal should be to keep pets who have good homes in those homes.

Haggerty: Exactly. That's the problem with all the click-the-clicker, only-be-positive training. If it works at all, it takes forever. Let's say the dog barks when the person leaves the house. I say, hide on the other side of the door, rush back inside, get in that dog's face. Let the dog know you're angry. Holler a few words. Shake that dog by the scruff of the neck. I realize this is not politically correct, but it works, and the problem ends.

Overall: Really now! Try that approach in life. Are you more successful encouraging people to do what you want, or hollering at them for doing what you don't want? It's the same in dog training. That dog is barking for a reason. Figure out the reason, and you'll likely solve the problem. It's all about meeting the animals' needs, and we know a lot more about how to do that than we did years ago. It doesn't mean you forget that they're animals; it's about treating them appropriately.

Dale: It seems to me that as our pets are treated increasingly as family members, more of us are relying on our pets for support.

Overall: We don't hang out on the front porch and visit with our neighbors like we used to. We're all so busy, there's no time for social interaction just for the sake of it. But a pet can change that. At the dog park you quickly learn the dogs' names. Eventually, you get around to learning the owners' names. Dogs are social icebreakers.

Lucas: In New York City, people don't stop and talk for the sake of talking. But if I have Phoebe or any dog with me, people walking by may just smile. More smiles -- that has to be good. Or they ask to pet the dog.

Overall: We're finally starting to understand what pets do for us. They do enrich our relationships with people. There's tons of research that demonstrates that our pets are physically good for us.

Dale: Our pets are normally not up on the sofa. But after a sad event, our dogs, Lucy and Chaser, spontaneously jumped up on the couch to console my wife, Robin, and me. And there we were, our family. Both dogs then began to cry, I suppose because we were. Maybe we need them now more than ever. Children grow up and move away. Sometimes you can't depend on them. Friends and relatives can be fickle. Our jobs are insecure. The world is as uncertain as it's been in a long time. Through it all, we know we can depend on our cats to purr in our ears and our dogs to tell us they are happy to see us. Maybe we can all learn something about love from them.

Haggerty: I'm on a lifeboat with a dog and a person. They both fall out. Who do I save? I've gotta go with the person, unless that person is Ted Bundy. The line is getting too fuzzy between two-legged children and four-legged. I love dogs; dogs are better than most people I know. Still, the point is that our pets are animals, not people.

Overall: If it's my husband that's overboard, I'd want to save him. But he wouldn't let me -- I'd have to save that dog first.

Dale: Why?

Overall: The dog didn't have a choice about going with you. We make those decisions. As caregivers, we're responsible for our animals. It may be the only complete love relationship you have in your entire life. Why screw that up?

Lucas: Why can't we love people and also love our animals? I'd like to think we can. Love your pets and spoil them, and you'll love spoiling them. I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

Overall: You're not less human because you love your animals unconditionally. You're more human. The measure of your humanity is the extent to which you raise the standard of taking responsibility for those who can't help themselves. Maybe if we can achieve this with our pets, we can generalize to all children and eventually even animals in the rain forests. We have to start somewhere. Dogs and cats are a good place to start.

Dale: I think the point is -- and I'm sure we all agree on this one -- we need to start soon.

Steve Dale hosts the WGN Radio show Pet Central and the syndicated Animal Planet Radio, and writes the syndicated column "My Pet World." In 2002, he received the American Veterinary Medical Association Humane Award.

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Tales from the "Age of Warped Woof"

Who let the dogs in? This dominance of pets in our social lives presents unique dilemmas in a human-canine comedy of manners. I write "Ask Dog Lady" (askdoglady.com) to hear stories of dogs, life and love and to offer suggestions about how to deal with the etiquette in this new Age of Warped Woof.

Here's one: A happily married woman calls her terrier "Husband No. 2." When "Husband No. 1" is away on business, she lets the dog sleep on the bed with her. Usually, the dog is banned from the boudoir by her spouse. He loves the pet but believes their sleeping dog should lie in its own comfy crate. The woman sees the absurdity of the situation but still feels doggone guilty about breaking the bedroom rule when Husband No. 1 is out of town.

Then there was the woman competing with her dog for her newly divorced suitor's affections. When her date came over, he would give the woman a quick peck on the cheek but shower the dog with hugs and kisses. Even before introducing the woman to his friends, the man asked if he could bring her dog to a family holiday dinner. Eager to please, the woman agreed. She sat home alone waiting for him and the dog to return, wondering if she stood half a chance with this guy.

Dog Lady politely suggested the bruised beau could only handle a commitment to her dog at the moment. Call it a human strain of heartworm.

-- Monica Collins

Cover photograph by DigitalVision.