More RelationTIPS Ask columnist Dennie Hughes your question

For love and money?

Is it really that bad to go after a guy initially because he has money if you know you will marry him only if you are truly in love?

Let's see. Would you think it was a bad thing if the only reason a guy was dating you was your money? Or, if the one you married professed true love, but only because you also happen to have a hefty bank account to go with it? Just because there seems to be no shortage of women and men (can we say, Kevin Fed-her-a-line?) whose motto is "love is grand, but 100 grand really makes my heart beat," doesn't make it OK.

And, as if being dishonest isn't bad enough, it could be even worse if you're upfront about your priorities and find a guy who's fine with it. (Believe it or not, there are dating websites, which shall go unnamed, that cater to this warped kind of relationship.) Talk about setting yourself up for failure: Guys who buy love usually have terrible intimacy issues and little respect for women.

Of course, it's OK to make "has a job" a part of your is-he-worth-dating list, and you should look for a man who has a good work ethic. However, what's most important is that he is honest, loyal, trustworthy and willing to make you a priority. You'll know you're in it for all the right reasons when you can vow "for richer or poorer" and actually mean it. Invest in yourself -- your own education and career -- so that you don't have to turn a relationship into a paycheck, as well.