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Issue Date: June 15, 2008
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A FATHER'S DAY SALUTE TO G.I. DAD |
Military families share togetherness
Powerful stories of dads who serve away from home
By Dennis McCafferty & Olivia Branco
Military dads too often are away when special events occur: first baby steps, birthday parties and high school graduations. The rituals that so many take for granted, these men learn to live without - including this weekend's celebration of Father's Day. But regardless of where they serve, dads strive to "be there" for their families. In the past, servicemen wrote long letters detailing everything from the minutiae of military life to their longing to be reunited. Today, with webcams, e-mail and other tech tools, it's easier to stay in touch. A father stationed far away can provide help on math homework, a bully problem or his daughter's first crush. Sometimes the involvement is more emotionally powerful. USA WEEKEND Magazine and "Military Times" have gathered hundreds of stories about great dads from their loved ones. For a special "Father's Day card," read on.
First-time dad
Spc. Spencer Hilliard, Army
My husband, Spencer, left for Iraq last year, after he learned he was going to be a daddy for the first time. Many asked him how he would deal with the fact that our daughter, Adalynn Dawn, would not recognize his voice after she was born. So he recorded a message for her saying, "Baby, I love you. I love you, baby." I tried to play it to my belly every day. Using a microphone in his computer, he spoke to her through the Internet every time I talked with him. During the pregnancy, he would catch up with my weekly blogs. I mailed him an ultrasound on DVD. He counted her toes and fell in love with her over and over again. He had the ultrasound pictures posted up all over his walls.
Spencer was able to come back home for just over two weeks when Adalynn was born in May, but then he soon had to return to Iraq. Once he comes home for good in January 2009, his daughter will know him well, as if he were by her side every day and night.
Rebekah Hilliard, Lancaster, Calif.
A bridge to precious memories
Lt. Col. Michael Price, Army
Michael Price is my dad. When he served in Afghanistan, I had to engineer the rebuilding of a 20-foot-long bridge, my Eagle Scout project. The bridge allows people to get to a local campsite. But it was in bad shape, unsafe to walk on. We also had to lengthen it by more than 3 feet. My dad's an engineer, so he was constantly helping me with it from over there through e-mails and phone calls. He instructed me on replacing parts with pressure-treated lumber and new handrails and securing it with 8-inch metal bolts. When he had two weeks of R&R, he came home and helped me finish. Everything fit together like Lego pieces. Building this with him was the greatest time ever. I'm an Eagle Scout now, thanks to my dad. The entire time I was working on this, he taught me that the experience was about the journey, not the destination. When I get old enough, I'm going to join the Army like Dad, to continue the journey.
Christopher Price, Colorado Springs
The red balloon comes home
Chief Petty Officer Dain Anderson, Navy
My husband, Dain, said goodbye to our four kids in 2005, heading to Iraq. Our son Daimon, then 2, felt lethargic. He had an E. coli infection and was critically ill. Our son Dawson, just 11 months old, also came down with the same disease. Thank God they survived! Dain was distraught at being away and dealing with possibly losing his two boys.
After they both got better, Daimon received a red balloon at a birthday party. As he left with his Grandma Bev, the balloon flew into the sky. He was upset, but she said, "Do you think the balloon is going to Iraq to give Daddy joy?" That made Daimon feel better. We told Dain about this. Two weeks later, he e-mailed us a beautiful picture of him holding a red balloon, telling us how happy he was to receive what his son sent. When Dain returned home just before Christmas 2006, he came off the plane carrying a red balloon. I've never seen such joy in a child as I saw in Daimon that day.
Kristi Anderson
A distant puzzle solved
Cmdr. Jeffrey Little, Navy
My husband, Jeff, was sent to Iraq in March 2007, and he met a contractor in the Green Zone who had a Rubik's Cube. The contractor gave Jeff some hints to solve it, and Jeff quickly realized the Rubik's Cube would be a great thing for our family to work on together while he was deployed. Jeff went online and ordered two Rubik's Cubes for our house and one for himself. Soon after, my husband and our sons, Daniel and Joshua, e-mailed back and forth, sometimes two or three times a day, exchanging tips. They're planning to put their secrets online, on a blog they can do together.
Now that they can solve the cube, they're in competition to see who can solve it the fastest. My boys are down to two minutes. Jeff is close behind at three minutes. It may seem like just a piece of plastic, but for us, the Rubik's Cube is a bridge that keeps us connected.
Ravy Little, Jacksonville
A vacation to remember
Lt. William Edenbeck, Navy
William, my husband, is dedicated to his country and family, and always stays upbeat. When he returned from a recent deployment in Afghanistan and Iraq on the USS Dwight D. Eisenhower, he decided that he wanted to do something special for our daughter, Riley, 6, so we went to Disneyland. The entire time we were there, he withheld from us that he had special orders to return to the Middle East again on assignment. We never knew. But at Disneyland, he was "the perfect dad," enjoying rides and wearing the paper crown at the "Princess Castle." He left shortly after we got back home. His passion for his country and his family amazes me.
Shelly Edenbeck
Commitment through hardship
Petty Officer 3rd Class John "Andy" Journell, Navy
John, who goes by his middle name of Andy, is my son-in-law. His daughter, Kylie, was born prematurely at 26 weeks in September 2007. My daughter, Amelia, died a day after the birth, and he was able to get from his ship to her bedside for that moment. Weeks before she died, she stood on Virginia Beach and wrote in the sand that she missed and loved Andy. She watched the waves wash over it, telling me that the ocean would float the message over to him on his ship.
After her death, he was in such pain. But he knew that his role as a father was critical. After Kylie's birth, he stayed at a Ronald McDonald house for more than four months to be with his daughter. When she was released, he made the difficult decision to place her with me, even though I live about 1,000 miles away from his home base in Norfolk, Va. Some people encouraged him to apply for a hardship case, to get out of serving the rest of his commitment so he could raise his daughter. But he refuses. The Navy gave him the time he needed to care for her.
After Kylie was released, he stayed at my home for three weeks and met with specialists for her. Officers from his ship called every week to see if he was OK, and chaplains were sent to see him. That's part of the reason Andy won't try to get out of his commitment. The Navy never gave up on him, and he's not one to take the easy way out.
Maria Oropallo, Columbia, Mo.
Journell with Kylie
Goodnight, moon
Master Sgt. John Dunne, Air Force
My husband, John, was in Iraq, and our two daughters asked about him every day. He called and e-mailed them as much as he could. He also stayed close to their hearts by telling them to keep looking at the sky at night. "On two sides of the world," he said, "we both share the same moon." Our little girls looked to the moon at night, knowing their dad was looking at it, too, and they felt close to him again.
Kelly Dunne, Bayonne, N.J.
Cover photograph by Drew Endicott for USA WEEKEND
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