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THINK SMART Helpful tips for your everyday life

Discuss cancer honestly with kids

October is national awareness month for breast cancer, which accounts for more than a quarter of all cancer diagnoses in American women. That means millions of mothers, sisters, daughters and grandmothers have had to break the bad news to loved ones.

Let the child guide your conversation, and answer his questions as truthfully as possible.

Announcing an illness is never easy, but the task is that much more difficult when your audience is a child. A new American Cancer Society book, Nana, What's Cancer? by breast cancer survivor Beverlye Hyman Fead and granddaughter Tessa Mae Hamermesh, 11, guides families through the delicate process. Fead's advice:

Share on a need-to-know basis. "I wouldn't go from A to Z. They don't need to know what could happen down the road," Fead says. "Don't say, 'I may get very sick, and then I may die.' " Let the child guide the conversation, and answer questions as truthfully as possible.

Don't treat "cancer" like a dirty word. Mention your specific disease, and explain it in simple terms.

Don't stop at a conversation. Help your child cope with kid-friendly books, such as "Mom and the Polka-Dot Boo-Boo" and "Because ... Someone I Love Has Cancer."

Consider counseling or a support group sponsored by a hospital or church. CancerCare.org connects you to free family support services nationwide.

Enlist your child's help so he won't feel so helpless. Let him know that his efforts -- from baking you cookies to hosting a lemonade-stand fundraiser -- will help to speed your recovery.