Issue Date: October 25, 2009
Why our road rage?
My husband is a mild-mannered guy who doesn't have an assertive bone in his body -- that is, until he's behind the wheel, and then his aggressive driving causes ugly confrontations with others. Why does he act like this and put us in harm's way?
C.H., New York
I spoke with several experts about why your guy may be acting out behind the wheel, and there are many theories. For example, if he only behaves like this when you're in the car, it could be a passive-aggressive way of taking out some deep-seated resentment on you. Or maybe he's just always running late and in an impatient rush.
He needs to speak to a counselor to help him understand why he's so angry and to learn how to manage his anger before he kills someone -- or ends up a victim of someone else's road rage.
Don't try to convince him to seek help when he's still upset. Tell him you love him and you're worried about his behavior. Then, make an ultimatum: Until he gets help, refuse to ride with him.
Here are a few more tips that can help reduce his stress level, according to the AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety:
Alter drive time to avoid the worst traffic congestion.
Make the car more comfy. Seat pillows and soothing CDs may help him feel less anxious.
Skip anger-inducing, antagonistic talk radio.
Never drive when tired.
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