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USA WEEKEND cartoons, including Affirmies and Thurbear | USA WEEKEND Magazine

Friday, October 5, 2007

Monday, July 2, 2007

"I considered hormone replacement therapy. But for me, I decided husband replacement therapy worked much better."


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Thursday, April 26, 2007


"Right about now, global warming doesn't sound so bad."

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"Didn't you get my e-mail?"

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"It's just a formality, but I'll also need a lock of your hair for DNA analysis."

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Thursday, April 19, 2007


"Looks like everyone is trying to have the first baby of the millennium."

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"What the chat room has brought together, let no man put asunder."

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"It's a 10-minute recipe but a 40-minute cleanup."

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Tuesday, April 17, 2007

"I'm so glad you're home. There's something in the refrigerator I want you to smell."

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"Hey, we should celebrate -- I've been wrong about everything for a whole year."

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"I think it was a fair settlement. I got the house and car. He got custody of the highway we adopted."

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"Just pretend she's a par four and you're Tiger Woods."

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"Henry! You aren't making a difference!"

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"Will a current automotive term finally help you understand? Leo, I have zero percent interest in you."

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Friday, April 13, 2007

"Not only have the drug companies merged -- apparently, so have their pills."

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"That's sweet. But I'd rather be a Bachelorette than a Desperate Housewife."

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"Look, Honey. I admitted I was wrong. I don't have to endure one of your lectures, too, do I?"

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

"No, I'm not the waiter. I'm the genetic engineer. How would you like your lamb?"

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"I liked the original remake better."

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